H: His Harvest Ministries, Lafayette County, Miss.

Maybe I underestimated Al Green’s preaching. The service closed with the usual call to Jesus. Inspirational music swelled and three people came forward, two black children and an older white women from Boston. The woman’s name was Pat. She wore an elaborate church hat. Al Green asked Pat her name (he forgot it later) and said “I have been waiting for you my whole life.” He prayed with his hand on her head. Pat from Boston received the full conversion experience.

The call makes me uncomfortable. This week I attended His Harvest Ministries, which meets in an old metal warehouse near the industrial park north of Oxford. The service defies all categories.

As I take my seat, three woman are standing on the altar speaking in tongues into the microphone. A choir of six women belts out hymns through a karaoke machine and kickin’ Peavey Amps. (Query: Peavey is based in Mississippi. Do the amps grow immediately from the needs of a southern church?) Twenty boys and girls in costume perform a choreographed lip sync. The lead speaker-in-tongues returns with another woman (both dressed in all white with a red smock) to perform an interpretative dance.

I am the only visitor.

The sermon has lots of Hallelujahs. The Preacher asks us to repeat the important words. Following First and Second Peter, she has us repeat, “I will gird myself for the Lord.” Everyone does. She tells us to “Wake Up!” Each member finds three people to remind the other: “Wake up! Wake up! Wake up!” A Deacon leads the congregation through a double offering.

Then the altar call. “Wave your hand if you are fully with me in spirit this morning,” the Minister says. I wave with everyone else. “Wave your hand if you accept Jesus into your heart this morning.” She pauses. “Wave your hand if you are interested in church membership.” I become very conscious that I am the only visitor. Another pause. “I guess we’re all alright then.”